Freedom to Soar-Coaching Blog of Rebecca Joie Oakes, BCMHC, CPLC

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. - Proverbs 4:23 I grew up in a culture that often dismissed matters of the heart. Perhaps this was a reaction to the emotionalism of the 1960s and 1970s, where decision-making was often based on the philosophy of "do what feels good or right." The Church, in turn, distanced itself from anything deemed "touchy-feely," Counseling and psychological insights were often dismissed as "worldly" or unnecessary. Faith, it was said, should be enough—if you truly trusted God, you wouldn’t need counseling. You would be spiritual enough to suppress emotion. Or perhaps this mindset stemmed from a misinterpretation of Jeremiah 17:9 , which states, "The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked." Many took this to mean that feelings were inherently evil rather than understanding the context: Jeremiah was warning against the idolatrous hearts of Judah, not condemning emotion...

For many, the holiday season is a time of joy, connection, and celebration. Yet for others, it stirs feelings of sadness, loneliness, anxiety, or irritability. Why does this happen? Research reveals that trauma often resurfaces during this time, triggered by memories stored in the brain—whether consciously or subconsciously. Human memory is complex, encompassing both explicit memories we can recall and implicit ones we may not remember but still influence our emotions and physical responses. A sound, smell, or event can unconsciously bring unresolved trauma to the surface. Understanding Trauma and Triggers Triggers can cause us to feel emotions that seem out of proportion to the present moment. For example, you might feel sadness or anger without knowing why. This could be due to the body recognizing a sensation similar to one experienced during a traumatic event. These instinctive responses—commonly known as fight, flight, freeze, or fawn—are the body’s way of coping. Fight: Reacting...

Maybe you have been to counseling and dealt with your traumatic history or disturbing life event but you still need help moving forward after healing.  Alternatively, your issue is not intense enough that you feel the need for mental health counseling, but you want support in thinking things through regarding a situation in your life and you need a listening ear while you sort things out.  Maybe you need a third party present to mediate a relationship issue. There could be many reasons to seek help from a life coach or mental health coach. Either way, you get to choose your path with a comforting, positive coach and environment. Here is a few of the many reasons why people might seek the support of a mental health coach or a life coach : Goal Setting : To identify and achieve personal, professional, or relational goals. Overcoming Past Trauma : To work through and heal from past hurts and emotional pain. Stress Management : To develop strategies for coping with stress and...

  Welcome! If you’ve found this page, it’s likely because someone referred you here, or perhaps you’re searching for support in facing a personal challenge or reaching a new goal. Whether you’re looking to improve relationships, boost self-esteem, or simply get unstuck from life’s struggles, I’m glad you’re here. As a Christian, board-certified mental health and life coach, my mission is to come alongside you in your journey toward wholeness and success. Life is full of challenges, and how we respond to them shapes who we become. Sometimes we all need a little help to navigate the difficulties and find freedom from what’s holding us back. God has uniquely created each of us with special gifts, talents, and a purpose. Yet, our life experiences can sometimes make it hard to express who we are at our core. If you feel like your potential is locked away or buried under stress, fear, or trauma, I’d love to help you unlock that potential and move toward the person you were designed to be...